


The only riddle he could not solve

by Taaya



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: M/M, OOC Sherlock, Online Dating, Post S4, at least a bit, then again 4x3 might have changed him a bit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-07
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-09-30 12:53:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10163438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Taaya/pseuds/Taaya
Summary: Maybe John is right. Maybe relationships fulfill you as a human? Sherlock knows he's got nothing to lose and so he starts to look for love in the safest way: Online dating.





	

Sherlock sighed. Maybe John was right. Well, not with everything, of course. Why would Sherlock want to start any kind of romantic relationship with Irene Adler? The woman was clearly a lesbian and as far as he knew she was engaged to her personal assistant by now. The texts between him and Irene were only … He could not describe it. But it was nice to have someone to share random thoughts with who was not John. He could not tell John everything, especially not now, after Mary. After Sherringford. It was just not possible. There was only so much a man could take. 

But maybe the doctor was right in one thing: That Sherlock should finally give this whole romance thing a try. Maybe romantic entanglement would fulfill him as a human being. What else had he got left? The best times lay behind them, that much was clear. There was no possibility to carelessly roam London, searching for criminals, anymore. Not when there was Rosie they had to think about. They could do cases, sure, but it would not be the same anymore, they had to look out for danger and avoid as much of it as possible and Sherlock knew he would end up being bored if he did not find something knew to keep him occupied. And drugs were off limits. Again, there was only so much John could take and Sherlock being high again would definitely be too much.

John. It always came down to John. There were days when Sherlock wished he had never met his best friend. Not because he did not like him. In fact the opposite was the case. He liked John too much and that was when it all got complicated. Caring was a dangerous disadvantage and even though he had become a better man thanks to John, before him it had all been easier. Not giving a damn about anybody or anything had been so easy to handle. But Sherlock knew there was no going back. He learned how to like somebody, how to love. He just fell in love with the wrong person. No, actually the right person, but a person too right for him to ever be his. How could he expect to ever deserve a man like John Watson? 

When John got dumped, he always tried again, Sherlock figured. He never mourned long - except for Mary, but that was different, even he understood that.  
So maybe he should do it John’s way? Just try again and forget one love with another? He had nothing to lose, had he? The worst case scenario was that he would not find anybody suitable, but even than he could spent some time deducing the idiots that tried to date him - and it would keep him from getting bored for at least a few seconds, maybe even minutes. Better than sitting around and doing nothing, right? 

And so Sherlock opened his laptop and started to search for a website that would fulfill his needs. “So … Online Dating”, he said and rubbed his hands, before clicking on the registration button. “Nickname.” He already wanted to give up. He needed a nickname that was not giving away his identity - hard thing when you’re known all over the bloody planet by now. “Hatman? Noooo, even I know it sounds too much like this comic figure. There was this … this guy on the telly that John likes. Blue box. He had Brainyspecs, he called them. Glasses. Why not Brainydecs? Brainydetective, which is obvious to anyone who’d look, but then no one does, do they?” 

So he typed it in. Brainydecs. Stupid name, he knew, but aren’t they all stupid?  
Gender: Male.  
Looking for: …  
Sherlock sighed again. He didn’t do romantic. The only person he ever loved was - is - a man, so he assumed he was at least rather gay.  
Looking for: a man.  
Hobbies: Being a smart ass, travelling, …  
Who cared if he only did it for cases?  
Sexual preferences: … 

Sherlock got up. “Who would ask that? So early? I mean, yeah, I do, but only for cases and then again I usually don’t ask, I just know.” He paced the room, thinking about what to answer. He could leave it open. But he wanted to do it right.  
Should he say that he considered himself asexual? But was he, really? His thoughts wandered off to John again and he tried picturing himself having sex with his best friend. A painful thought, but only because he could not have John. Yes, he was not exactly driven by his sex drive, but for John? With John? He’d probably enjoy it. 

Sexual preferences: No specific preferences, but open for suggestions.  
Yes, that would do it for now.  
A few clicks here and there to add tv, book and music preferences, then the London tube map as a profile picture and he was done.  
Now all he had to do was wait. He did not want to go looking himself. Too many idiots out there. When he waited for them to send him a message, he could at least ignore a few of them. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

John sat in front of his laptop, rocking Rosie’s crib with one hand. Should he really do this? Mary’s death had not been long ago, was he really ready to move on?  
But Rosie needed a second parent and John was sick of mourning a wife he had not really known. He was not even sure anymore if he ever loved her. In a real true love way of loving. She’d rather been some kind of anchor. In the beginning it had been easier with her. But then she became the stranger, the assassin and he had realized that he never knew her at all. Had never really wanted to get to know her, had never tried to.  
In fact, he now knew she had only been a surrogate for somebody else. Somebody he could not have either, not in this way. 

“This time we’ll do it right, Rosie. We’ll find somebody we both like and we won’t rush it. No marriage after only a few months, no sex on the first date - oh, you didn’t hear that one, you understand? This time we’ll find out if we really want to know them at all. Only chatting and only if they remain interesting, we might date them, right?” 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

He sighed deeply and opened his laptop. For two days Sherlock had tried not to be curious but he could not wait any longer. He had to see if anyone had the slightest interest in him. 

You have 32 new messages. 

For heaven’s sake, so many? His ego just got boosted by the number of people who thought he could be their perfect partner. But by browsing their profiles, he could eliminate many of them. Picture of biceps and muscles, no face though, not a celebrity according to the rather clumsy sounding answers to the profile questions. Not ashamed of his looks, but still not trying to get people to look at him directly. “Cheating”, Sherlock deduced. “Probably on his wife, according to the prefered television shows.” 

Three others had problems with orthography, so they were clearly too stupid for him. Screwing up orthography in texts or on Twitter was one thing. But being so careless when they wanted to look for their true love? That was a sign of stupidity or arrogance. He did not like either. 

At least ten started with ‘Hi’, so he deleted their messages without even opening them.  
In the end he started writing with four men. Matching percentages between 85 and 95 percent. But one did interest him the most. 

‘Notadoctorbutthedoctor’, male, living in London. Four years older than Sherlock. No profile picture of himself, but of a stethoscope, meaning he probably really was a physician. But, according to the nickname, he was also a fan of Doctor Who. As John, Sherlock thought with a smile.  
Single father - Sherlock was not sure what to think of that. He got along with children better than he ever anticipated and he loved Rosie, but then again not every child was as clever as the kid at John’s wedding or as cute as Rosie. But he could not judge the child from it’s father’s dating website profile, he was clever, but not omniscient. 

But the most intriguing was the message itself: You want to be a smart ass? I’ve met a few very clever people. Show me that you’re even better.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Brainydecs: You are a doctor. Clearly. Doctor Who fan. Thought not that much a fanboy that you collect merch, otherwise you would have put a sonic screwdriver next to the stethoscope. So you like it but you don’t define yourself with just one show. You wrote single father, but the way you wrote it hints at it being a daughter. Probably rather young. Especially since there is a light stain of drool on the surface on which you took the profile picture. Girl because the short sentences about your child seem somewhat softer in tone, even though in everything else you write more professional, so you soften your tone while thinking about your child, which is rather done for daughters than for sons. In the other paragraphs you sound as if you’d write. Not for living, you are mainly a doctor, but maybe you blog about it or wrote one of this silly nonfiction ‘This is how my life feels like’ books. And I’d say you’re a widower, though you have emotional baggage. Maybe trust issues? You write not as if you were dumped too often or in too badly a manner - therefore you are not desperate. Instead you seem to be very careful with who you are going to date here. Could be because of your daughter, too. But I assume, she’s only one part of the reason. Clever enough? If you send me a picture of your breakfast, I could tell you if you’re sick and how you slept last night. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor sent a picture.  
Notadoctorbutthedoctor: But you don’t have to tell me my illnesses, I’m a doctor. 

Brainydecs: Correction, you are THE doctor. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: And you are a smart ass. Not the cleverest I’ve ever seen though. But clever enough and still bloody brilliant. 

Brainydecs: Thank you. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: You’re welcome. So … why are you here, then? If you can figure out that much just looking at one picture and a few lines, is it that hard to find someone interesting on the street? 

Brainydecs: According to people I am not very good with them. So I thought I’d give this a try. Less social norms to look out for. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: You are writing honestly about yourself. I like that. 

Brainydecs: It’s easier this way, I guess. And you? Why are you here? 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Honestly? I don’t know. I mean it’s not that I’m extremely lonely. Sure, I miss someone to hold at night. But it’s more for my daughter. We have a couple of great friends who’re always there for us when we need them. But it’s not the same as having two parents. But maybe … Maybe I’m also trying to forget somebody. 

Brainydecs: Your wife? 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: No. I mean, yes, she too. But someone else. 

Brainydecs: Care to talk about it? 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: You’re a stranger. 

Brainydecs: So are you. Sometimes it’s easier to talk to strangers. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Yeah. Okay. Well, there was this bloke. I guess I have had this crush on him for years on end and … It has got to end. He’s a friend of mine and asexual and I don’t want to lose him as a friend. So I have to forget him. And who knows, maybe I even find my true love on the way? 

Brainydecs: Sounds familiar. I have a friend, too. Not asexual, though. Straight. Very good friend of mine, but whenever he went off to a date, I felt this pain in my stomach. And when he got married I almost died. I don’t want to lose him, either. And though he’s a bit slow sometimes I don’t know how long I can keep him thinking I’d not be interested. He thinks I have a crush on a woman we once met. But … One day he’ll figure it out if I don’t forget him. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor is offline. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Sorry, my daughter woke up and would not stop crying. It took hours to calm her down.

Brainydecs: It’s okay. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: No it isn’t. I was being an ass, going offline without saying anything. I’m still not good at this single father thing, and I’m screwing up everything else when I get nervous about being a good dad. 

Brainydecs: It really is okay. I understand. I have a goddaughter and with her I’m the same. Not my own child, though. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Do you want to have kids some day? 

Brainydecs: I should spread my genes, I’m brilliant as you put it ;)  
Brainydecs: But no. Not really. Not because I would not like them, but because my life is complicated. I sometimes work with dangerous chemicals and while it’s easy to look after my godchild every once in a while, I could not watch for my own child 24/7. And I could never forgive me if anything would happen to my son or daughter because of me. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: This should repell me, right? I mean I’m looking for somebody for me and my daughter. 

Brainydecs: Okay. Bye then? 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Nah.It should, but it doesn’t. I’m chatting with five others here and by now you’re the only one who’s interesting. 

Brainydecs: Likewise. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: So ...you’re a chemist then? 

Brainydecs: How arrogant would it sound if I said I’m a universal genius? 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: On a scale from 1 to 10? 11 ;) 

Brainydecs: I don’t do only that for a living. I consult people. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Business-wise? 

Brainydecs: Among other, yes. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: You like being mysterious, right? 

Brainydecs: Maybe ;) 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Okay, but I gotta go for today. I have to work tomorrow. Sleep tight. It was nice meeting you, mysterious man. I look forward to talk to you again. 

Brainydecs: Good night, doctor. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: You there? 

Brainydecs: Yes. Hello. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Hello. :)  
Notadoctorbutthedoctor: May I ask you something? Something rather delicate? 

Brainydecs: Sure.

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: How does it feel to sleep with a man? 

Brainydecs: You wrote that you are interested in both. Men and Women. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: I am. 

Brainydecs: But then you should know, should you not? 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: I never even kissed a man. 

Brainydecs: Oh. Well. Me neither. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: But you stated that you’re gay. 

Brainydecs: I am. I think. It’s only ever been this one guy. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Same here. I mean. Women, sure. Lots. Though no real love among them. But men? It’s only been him. 

Brainydecs: Your Mister Asexual? 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Yeah. 

Brainydecs: But no real love among the women? You are a widower. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Yeah. Yeah, I am. It’s pathetic, isn’t it? I loved my wife, but rather as a friend. 

Brainydecs: No, not pathetic. Not really. Loneliness makes us do crazy things. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Like using a dating website? 

Brainydecs: Exactly. Though I have to admit it feels good to have somebody to talk to. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Yeah. I’m happy I found you. You sound like a great guy. 

Brainydecs: I could be a serial killer looking for gay men, only trying to sound nice. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: You could. But I highly doubt it. I’m not low maintenance enough for a good murder. Chatting for days, without even asking for a date? Too much work for a serial killer. And not a one time only-killer either. To say that you’re a virgin might make you look weak - though I do not think so - and if you would want to kill somebody, you’d prefer to be in a position of power, would you not? Therefore I think you are just the lonely guy, madly in love with a straight man, that you pretend to be. 

Brainydecs: I was supposed to be the clever one. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: So I’m right? 

Brainydecs: You are. And you’re a great guy, too. Off to bed now - my goddaughter’s father says I’m not allowed to play with her if I had not slept. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Sleep is healthy, you know? But yeah, off to bed. Good night, brainy.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

During the next weeks Sherlock spent every spare minute chatting with the doctor. He told him things about himself he never told anyone else. It even started to hurt less each time he saw John. Maybe his friend had been right all along and relationships actually were good? 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Hey Brainy, sorry, but for the next few hours I might be texting you a little less. Gotta go visit a friend. I’ll miss you, though. 

Brainydecs: Don’t worry, Doctor. I expect to see a friend of mine here soon, anyways. And I hate it when he gets curious. Not sure if I’m ready to tell, you know? 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: I know. Same here, mate. But one more question … Do you think we should meet someday? 

Right when Sherlock wanted to answer, John came in. 

“Hey Sherlock”, he just said and went on to the kitchen. Anybody else would find it rude to just make tea in a friend’s kitchen without asking, but for them it was completely normal and right now the detective was glad John occupied himself, so that he could answer his Doctor. 

Brainydecs: Sorry, friend is here now. Yes, I would very much like to meet you. 

He heard a notification alert and saw how John slipped his mobile out of his pocket, looking down at it. He put the kettle on the stove and began typing, smiling while he did it. 

“You look happy. You got some text and you are happy about it”, Sherlock stated calmly, though he felt a rush of jealousy in the pit of his stomach. 

Obviously John was done typing and looked up. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess I am”, he just said and looked for the tea bags. 

“So, you’ve moved on.” The younger man tried to sound as matter of factly as possible and turned back towards his laptop. His Doctor had replied. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Good. That’s very good. When are you available?

Brainydecs: How about tonight? 8pm? Dinner in a restaurant, so you can make sure that I really am no serial killer? 

“And you are seeing someone”, Sherlock continued, just in time with another notification alert. 

John looked at his phone and smiled yet again. “I am. Tonight, for that matter. I was … wondering if you could babysit Rosie.” Without waiting for an answer he began typing again. 

“In fact I promised Lestrade to come to the Yard this evening. He needs help. It’s only a four so I did not want to bother you with it, but he sounded desperate. And I made a deal that I could see his cold cases if I help him. Might something fun in there.” Lying was usually very easy, but with John it became hard to do. Sherlock felt terrible. “But I … am happy, that you ... are well again. And I would very much love watching over Rosie the next time.” 

John looked up confused. “That might have been the nicest thing you ever said to me. Okay, I’ll just ask Molly.” And that was hard to accomplish after the wonderful speech at the wedding that made even John shed a tear or two. 

“I try my best”, Sherlock replied with a grin and turned back to his laptop once again while John had to turn to the kettle that began to whistle due to boiling water. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: I know just the place. Ever heard of Angelo’s? 

Brainydecs: The owner is a friend of mine. 

Again he heard John’s phone but this time he paid no attention.

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Of yours, too? He’s a friend of mine as well. 

Brainydecs: We might have already met. Intriguing. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Don’t think so. I would have noticed you. You sound too good to not be noticeable. 

Brainydecs: Good thing my friend pays more attention to his phone than to me - and they say I’m rude. But I would rather not have him see how you make me blush. 

Notadoctorbutthedoctor: Okay, I’ll try not to harm your image any further. See you tonight, love. 

Sherlock stared at the last word in shock. He knew that people used this word everyday. ‘D’you want another coffee, love?’ by a simple waitress or nurses in hospital, asking: ‘Another pillow, love?’ Still, it was never used for him - except for Mrs. Hudson on good days. Not by anyone that truly mattered in a romantic way. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Sherlock was nervous. Facing a mass murderer? Easy. But meeting a stranger he might have a crush on? He felt his pulse basically everywhere in his body, but mainly did it concentrate on his throat, making him feel as if he were to throw up due to nervousness. It was 7:59pm and soon this guy was about to come. 

He heard the door open and looked up. And froze.  
“Sherlock? What are you doing here?”, John asked. “I thought you were meeting Lestrade at the Yard. Please don’t tell me, you’re about to crash my dates again. This isn’t just for me, you know? This is for Rosie as well.” 

His voice sounded rough when Sherlock replied. “John, this here isn’t about you at all. I … am meeting somebody. I have … a date as you might put it.” 

“With Lestrade?” 

Sherlock stared. “No. Well. I certainly hope not, but I am not sure.” 

“Blind date?” 

The detective only nodded. 

“Shit. I mean. Me … too … Oh no. No, come on. Decs for detective, right? Tell me, you did not go on a dating website to … mock me or to … “ John was lost for words in anger and frustration.

Sherlock closed his eyes for a second. Then he pulled out his mobile phone, opened the app of the dating site and wrote a message. 

Brainydecs: Everything I said was true, John. I am here, trying to forget the only person I ever loved. Love. Present. 

He hesitated. John’s phone made it’s noise again and he watched the doctor pull out his phone to read before he continued.

Brainydecs: Maybe it is time to tell you about this man. He’s my goddaughter’s father, you know? He saved me time and time again. And when he told me earlier today that he was seeing someone tonight I was jealous. Even though I found you and I fell in love with your words, I still love him. I’ll always love him.

He looked up to see John wiping the tears from his eyes. 

“So … you’ll have to be careful with your work then. Because I don’t want to have Rosie play with detached thumbs either, but I really, honestly think that you are just the one we need in our lives.” 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

It took John six months to move back into 221B. Even though he was sure that Sherlock was the one, he had promised Rosie to make it right and he kept his promise. He did not rush into a relationship this time. At daytime he met Sherlock, his partner in solving crimes, and ran after criminals, at night he went of to dates with Sherlock, his lover and friend. They spent whole weekends as a family, picnicking in the park with Rosie or visiting the zoo, until John was sure that Sherlock was okay with becoming a father, waking up to a crying child. 

They even found a compromise for Sherlock’s experiments. 221C became the new lab and even clients had to go down there so that Rosie could live a peaceful live without hearing about murder. 

When John carried the last box with his stuff into their now shared bedroom he turned and looked up to Sherlock. “You know what?” 

“Hm?”, was the only answer he got, so he continued: “The best bit of the story is, that one day I can tell our grandchildren that my identity as his online flirt was the only riddle Grandpa Sherlock could not solve.”


End file.
